How to become the world's richest man: drop out of college
30 years later, Bill Gates gets "honorary" degree
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Microsoft chairman Bill Gates will be the main speaker at Harvard University's commencement in June. As is customary for commencement speakers, Gates will be given an honorary degree, something he failed to earn 30 years earlier while attending the university. Gates left after a short two years to form Microsoft, a decision that appears to have paid off. Now, he will finally take his place among the alumni, at least in a technical sense.
It was at Harvard that Bill Gates met Steve Ballmer, co-founder of Microsoft, who lived down the hall in the same building. Steve Ballmer still remembers the early days.
"College definitely wasn't for Bill," he said. "He was never in class. Most of his time was spent working on a master plan that would make billions of dollars, or so he told me. I just went along with it because I needed a job. Now, Microsoft controls the universe."
Bill's team of professional speech writers has already prepared what they claim to be the ultimate speech of all time. The title: "You don't need a degree to be the richest man in the world."
"Bill hopes to inspire the students by telling them their grades don't matter," Melinda Gates said. "You can flunk out and still create the biggest empire on the planet. When the pressure's off, students can truly do their best."
Mr. Gates hasn't submitted a finished copy of his speech to Harvard, but we obtained a rough draft. Below is an excerpt from the upcoming speech:
You don't need a degree to succeed. What you need to do is steal everyone else's ideas and use them to gain control of a market. Then use that power to buy your way into other markets until you have an empire. Along the way, lock people into proprietary formats to ensure your continued dominance. Done.
The first thing I would do is drop out of this school and begin building my empire. And hire some good lawyers while you're at it.
Students have already started dropping out in advance to work on their own hobbies, hoping to turn them into businesses. By the time of the commencement ceremony, almost no one is expected to be attending.
"It's great," Steve Ballmer said. "I'm even thinking about going back for my degree. That way, if I ever need toilet paper... well, you know."
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Written By: swadmin
Date Posted: 3/24/2007
Number of Views: 1135
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